The Day I Chose to Go Back to Work

After everything that had happened, I knew I had to make a difficult decision.

I needed to work.

Not because I wanted to forget my problems, and not because of another person.

I needed to work because I had responsibilities that could not wait.

My boyfriend had already helped me financially for a long time. During the last three months, when I had stopped working, I had been using his money throughout that time.

He had supported me until he eventually had to take on bank debt.

At the same time, his parents were in the hospital, and he also had responsibilities and expenses within his family.

I knew that I could not keep asking him to carry everything for me.

I had to find a way to help myself.

So I spoke to a friend who is a Manager.

I told my friend that if they knew another workplace, I wanted help finding a job.

I did not want to return to my old boss.

It was not because he was a bad person.

I actually felt embarrassed and indebted to him.

In the past, whenever I had problems, I had returned to work with him many times. Then, when my life became better, I left again.

I felt that I had troubled him too many times.

My friend told me to talk to the boss.

But I was too afraid to do it myself.

So my friend contacted him for me without telling me first.

Later, my friend messaged me and told me to return to start work at a shop.

I thought it was a new workplace.

But when I arrived, I realized that it was actually under the same boss.

He owns and manages several shops and workplaces.

At that moment, I felt both surprised and grateful.

Even after I had stopped and returned many times, he still gave me another opportunity to work.

For that, I am grateful to him.

To me, he is someone who gave me a work opportunity and helped me when I needed it.

That is all.

There has never been anything romantic or sexual between us, and I have never thought about him in that way.

The boss has many places to take care of.

Some months, I may barely see him, sometimes only once a month.

When we do speak, our conversations are about work.

I understand that from the outside, someone might misunderstand the situation.

But the truth is simple.

I returned to work because I needed money.

I needed to pay my expenses.

I needed to help myself.

And I needed to start standing on my own again.

I also wanted to keep building my website and continue looking for online work.

I still want to create something that belongs to me.

Something I can build with my own hands and eventually turn into my own income.

When I work, I always try to make the workplace better.

I try to solve problems, take care of customers, and prevent complaints.

I do not want the place I work to be damaged because of me.

In Thailand, I worked as a Manager for about three years.

It was not in a spa.

I worked in a pub, where I learned how to communicate with customers, take care of people, solve problems, and handle difficult situations.

Those experiences are still part of me.

I use what I learned from them wherever I work today.

I know that my decision to return to work may not make everything easy.

There are still problems between me and the person I love.

Sometimes there is jealousy.

Sometimes there is misunderstanding.

But I do not want my work to become a reason for us to hurt each other.

I want him to understand the truth from me.

I went back to work because of my situation.

I needed to earn money and help myself.

Not because of another man.

I still love him.

And I still hope that one day, we can understand each other better and trust each other again.

For now, I am learning something important.

Sometimes going back to work does not mean giving up on the life you wanted.

Sometimes it means doing what you have to do today

so that you can build the life you want tomorrow.

I went back to work because I had to.

But I also went back because I wanted to stand on my own again.

And this time,

I want to build a future that I can call my own.

That is the story so far. Thank you for reading.